Posts Tagged ‘obama’

…I’m well aware the Presidents office is called the “OVAL OFFICE”  but since former President Bill Clinton did his thing in there with “Monica Lewinsky” and got caught. I like to call it the “ORAL OFFICE”. And the reason the Presidents job is no longer desirable to young men. I mean if the President can’t relax in his own office why do the job?  I would be afraid the whole damn place is wired by now with tiny cameras in the couches and furniture pieces. I’d be scared to grab my dick in that office. Wouldn’t you ladies? (somebody might see us). I wouldn’t touch shit in that room.

Nevertheless, it turns out while President Obama was on a well deserved paid vacation down at “Martha Vineyards”. Just sipping on some gin and juice. Kicking it with his baby-gurl, Michelle, and the kids, riding bikes, (No Basketball reported). Well, when he arrived back this week his “Oral” office I mean, “Oval” office had been pimped out!

He had all of the former first ladies yellow color rugs and couches removed and replaced by some earth tones and shit… A good question. Who gets the former Presidents furniture? “GoodWill” ? Or is it shipped to the former Presidents, present residence.

Here’s your ugly ass furniture back. That wouldn’t be nice. President Obama stressed that the remodeling wasn’t paid  for with tax payers money… Like that’s going to make all of us feel better about his administrations spending! C’mon “Bro”…. Americans eventually paying for all this shit.

“That’s a Wrap 4 Real”

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911 911 911…The heroes need their health care and so do the rest of us.

The new job bill that’s just sitting in the books waiting to be passed(if you can believe that). As Americans are losing jobs faster then Obama can become completely grey haired.

This bill would cut taxes and create jobs for Americans by lending small businesses money to function. And according to President Obama, this legislation is already paid for, no more money is needed to put it into action. President Obama also mentioned in so many words that the opposition in the White House has continued to block this bill and not get it passed. These dumb mudder-fluckers…(okay I said that, but I mean it). Obama calls it obstruction, we call it ignorant. Ignorant asses’.

We have the highest rate of unemployment ever and we all know that this mess was left behind by the Bush-shit. The “Troops” are coming home now. And to what? Yeah they might of helped another country(Iraq)get their shit together while we’re failing our own home and them(Our troops).

Right here in America! Civilian life will suck for them because it’s sucking for most of their families already. Some Senators are obstructing this bill, over eighty percent of them are in favor of it,  according to the words of the good prophet Barack Obama.

I mean President.

These few rich weird men and women are blocking what’s necessary for small businesses to stay in business. Money.

President Obama looked a little pissed and frustrated this morning when saying to the Republicans who are specifically obstructing this job bill.  ”Move Biatch…Get Out The Way…Get Out The Way….Get Out The Way!” as he stepped off from the mic.

“That’s a Wrap4Real”

Former Gov. Rod Blagojevich was found guilty on one count out of twenty four.(5yrs in the pen)

In baseball he would be a superstar. He stepped to the mic tonight thanking everybody like he just won an “Oscar” or another election. He started rhyming like he was Jesse Jackson, “I did not lie, to the FBI”. He’s claiming persecution by the prosecution of the state of Illinois. The states new Governor is spending tens of millions of dollars to prosecute the dude with the wig looking hair-do.

While the streets of Chicago and in many other places in the state of Illinois go unattended. Is that not funny?

What does the prosecution plan to accomplish by taking homie down? Because in the back of their little naughty heads the Democrats opposition believes they can still link this dude to Obama. But they have to make him a political criminal first.

A sleaze-ball you might say and Blago clearly fits the role. The opposition I now like to call Fox News and the Republicans are going to somehow connect the whole thing to the Obama’s administration. See how they connect Blago’s sleaziness to Obama.

The joke is they’ll probably plan on using this incident as a blemish on any political person from Chicago. That not even Oxy 5(pimple medicine) can get rid of. And we all know the Presidents from Chicago. By 2012 the opposition will have naked pictures of  Barack and Blago cracking crab in a crack-house smoking a pipe.

“That’s a Wrap4Real”

(click here)Hit me when you get to florida and bring me back my lighter!

Talk about some funny(shit)news, the Press Secretary Robert Gibbs got a lil’ comical at the White House the other day.  And now everyones asking for the guys walking papers. The guy is paid to speak and not to do jokes. Now it’s clear to me why I could never be a Press Secretary. Gibbs usually does a great job at relaying President Obama’s messages like he should.

But this day he was feelin’ the herb or the “Chi” or something. Shit they give you an audience and a mic it’s on. Anyway, the thing that Press Secretary Gibbs said to some liberal critics was… Those who think Obama is “like George Bush,” he said, “ought to be drug-tested.” Funny!!! Not only did he just snitch out some possible drug users in the White House but he’s probably right.

Anyone who thinks Obama is like Bush. You got(s) to be on some kind of mild medication. Don’t you think? I mean they’re…

…Like the Press Secretary was trying to say. Gibbs had Obamas’ back!

He was trying to defend his boi’ from all this undeserved criticism. And now they want a good ol’ lynching(no pun intended).  What, he can’t look out for his homie?

Asking Gibbs to resign from his post for this “Keepin’ it real” comment or because he doesn’t make an apology is ludicrous and funny news to us. And just straight out bitchy.

Obama hasn’t proven to be the best politician yet, but so far he’s better.

“That’s a Wrap4Real”

Hillary got my number?

We should just rename the two parties, “One for the people”, the other “Not for the people”..Bottom line.

“That’s a Wrap4Real”

More funny news. Its’ the game plan for Obama’s re-election.

The Democratic party has given the American people no reason to be confident in Obama’s re-election in 2012. Turning white wouldn’t help him at this point. The DNC isn’t confident either, so with O, Joe and Hilary in agreement they have drawn up a winner plan.

They’ve done this just in time before the party for the middle-class loses ALL it’s gas and ass. The party that seems to be bent on being not for the people(Republicans).

Their party is a true threat in regaining power by 2012. They have blocked everything possible, including Obama’s dreams.

They have filibustered the mans dreams. Damn! Can a black man get a break up in the White House? He did get elected.

But we here at FSNToday warned my friendly white Americans back in the primaries even though half of you knew the world was ready for a change and you’ve made it. That they were going to give your elected President a hard way to go.

There’s still so much resistance and unwillingness in the White House to help this President look out for America.

I used to joke the only way a Black man was going to get into the White House is if he burglarized the place. So I knew he wasn’t going to change much in his first term. The Republicans are counting on this frustration that all who voted for him before, couldn’t allow themselves to do it again.

I could here the liberals saying, ” We gave it a shot. But we’re going to have to go  back to voting for the white guy”.  No you won’t.

The Democrats have a plan that should  renew confidence. Believe you me the Democrats plan to make a move that would leave a chess player baffled.  And because I’m in such close communications with the brotha’ himself(you know the brotha’ in the White House)I’m going to lay this plan out for my readers.

You want to hear it? Hear it goes… Joe Biden, our Vice President, better known as “Big Balls Biden” is a soldier, he originally wanted to be the Secretary of State. He’s the man who has the balls to step up to foreign leaders around the world and represent America. Hilary got balls too, but she wants to use them for the Presidency. So, she is going to step down from her role as Secretary of State. Then Obama will select Hilary to be his next Vice President in 2012.

Now what this does is make a smooth and favorable transition for Biden, to become Secretary of State. Everyone’s happy. Especially the American people, now we can make some great moves towards real change in the White House and with foreign policies.

Now these blocks and barriers that the Republicans keep throwing up, will be tore down.

Because you see in 2016 the Democrats can keep the White House by electing it’s first woman President into office.

Yes your already knowing.  Hillary “Hush your mouth” Clinton that’s right she will run in 2016, or if this plan goes to shit, she’ll do it in 2012. Which I predicted in a comedy routine on national t.v. back in 2002(on BET,  The New Orleans 10th anniversary show). Back when there was no talk of a Barack Obama.

Now let’s recap, 2012 Hilary resigns as Secretary of State.

Next move Obama selects Hilary”Hush your mouth” Clinton to run with him as his next Vice President. This gives Americans what they wanted in the first place. So, you see the Democratic party will be thrilled to hear this news.

The next move after that will be that Joe”Big Balls Biden” will resign as V.P. and show America how happy he is to finally become the Secretary of State. The job he has always wanted.

Now the final move(to guarantee that the way government does business will change) in the 2016 elections Hilary Rodham Clinton will run for President of the United States and win.(Public option gets done).

Well there it is my fellow Americans, prepare yourselves to trudge the road of happy destiny and piss off the red states.

“That’s a Wrap4Real”

Blogga!